I was cleaning out my yahoo sent mail and I came across the Goodly parent article I had sent to one of the yahoogroups I used to be on. I think the Lord needed me to review it again. A gentle reminder that I do strive to be a goodly parent. It is hard. I'm not always successful and 3 out of the 4 children will tell you I'm doing great! ha ha!
I have been cleaning out books too. I am reading a book right now that is called "Extremes", How to Keep your Virtues from Becoming Vises. by Robert Eaton.
As I was soaking in the tub (big garden tub with a home spa swirling, awww) I was reading this book. I have to read it slowly, its pretty deep for this shallow, home town girl. I reflected on what Sheri Dew has said in her God Needs a Powerful People. As you read, she has wonderful fun stories and analogies, I love her books, but the bottom line that I got from that book was....LIVE YOUR LIFE so that the HOLY SPIRIT CAN GUIDE YOU!
Absolutely! I have no arguments with that.
I'm cleaning out the bookcase yesterday (Monday is clean and organize day for me, Yes I still try to keep up on the CREATION PLAN, a guiltfree way of house keeping) and I couldn't find my January Ensign. I asked outloud...only one in range was Karrea, she just looked at me strange. The spirit said to me, Look in Adriennes room. OH MY, needle in a haystack. I love her, but clean and organize, YA RIGHT! (I only hear excuses, I understand, but find a method that works girl. ha ha)
I found the Ensign. Buried under some other papers on her 3 tier night stand. I love the messages I get for the Visiting Teaching. I want to share the one that stood out to me, that goes along this line of Life with the Spirit. I told you I'm a list maker, I love the minute it takes me to write a list, and I love the satisfaction I get by crossing it off! YAY!
Here is a list for Us Ladies.
I'll start with the quote first from Julie B Beck, RS GP:
"Latter-day Saint women must be strong and immovable in their faith. They can and should excel in living and sharing their testimonies of the Lord Jesus Christ and His restored gospel. We do this as we:
1. Make and keep covenants with Him.
2. Are worthy and worship in His temples
3. Study His doctrine in the scriptures and the words of the prophets.
4. Qualify for, recognize, and follow the Holy Ghost.
5. Share and defend His gospel.
6. Participate in sincere personal and family prayer.
7. Have family home evening.
8. Live principles of self-reliance and provident living.
"These are essential things which must be done before nonessential things. These simple, indispensable practices hat almost seem mundane.
...No one can do these things for us-these are personal practices and habits that set us apart as strong and immovable for that which is correct" (What Latter-day Saint Women do Best:Stand Strong and Immovable." Liahona and Ensign, Nov 2007, 109-10).
I think there was some problems when she spoke on this, a lot of ladies lashed out at her. I for one was grateful. 'She gave me a list!' ha ha!
I just hope that as we strive to live to be goodly parents (grand parents)that we can do the things that have been taught here in these articles.
Why do I love to clean? I get things looking nice, I find things I have been missing, and I even love to clean out the cobwebs in my soul!
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
When Parents Aren't "Goodly".
When Parents Aren't “Goodly.” By Joni Hilton
Some time ago a sister in Relief Society shared that she absolutely cringes every time she hears the song, I Am a Child of God , because of the line, “has given me a loving home with parents kind and dear.” Her upbringing was anything but kind and dear, and she felt cheated of something everyone else seemed to have.
But this sister is hardly alone. Though it isn't always discussed, many others feel this same sense of loss, and even resentment, that they didn't come from “an ideal LDS family.” Yes, we hear lots of talks and testimonies expressing gratitude for wonderful parents—and may God bless those who truly are-- but there is a vast group who cannot echo these sentiments, and whose parents were neglectful, abusive, selfish, or destructive.
No one has the statistics on just what per cent of our population is truly “ideal,” but one need only to get intimately acquainted with other members to see that not all our families do everything right and live every commandment to the letter. Many in every ward are the “walking wounded,” survivors of terrible upbringings, struggling to make sense of why they had to endure innocence lost and mourning their unhappy childhoods.
My father was an LDS marriage counselor and often reminded folks that, despite having the recipe for happy living, LDS homes were nevertheless afflicted with all the same problems we see “in the world”: incest, beatings, threats, drug abuse, the gamut. Head-in-the- sand members would gasp and insist that certainly such sins were not among Latter-day Saints, but the reality is that these horrors do indeed afflict our culture, and will best be solved by facing them honestly, not by denying their existence.
Do we have fewer problems than non-LDS families? We hope so. LDS families are known for taking commitments seriously, for spending more time together than average, for loving and supporting one another, for teaching noble values, and for fostering closeness among extended relatives. We know our education rates are higher and our divorce rates are lower. But there is no way to measure perfect parenting, so we can only assume that our emphasis on family life is yielding healthy fruit for the most part. I think we all agree that, if you want to be a good parent, being a good LDS parent is your best shot.
So what can a member do, who's one of the ones who fell through the cracks, whose parents dropped the ball? What can you, as a Home or Visiting Teacher, impart to these members to give them hope and comfort?
Ten points come to mind:
1. Don't wait for cruel people to apologize. Generally when someone is capable of such meanness, they are not the type of person who later reflects and feels remorse leading to a heartfelt apology. Our charge is to forgive them regardless of whether they've said they're sorry. We need to forgive them for our own sake, so we can make spiritual progress. Don't let them keep you down by nursing a grudge or harboring resentment; then you've let them hurt you twice! Forgiving them doesn't mean you continue to let them heap anguish into your life; it means you have stopped hating them for it and have moved on.
2. Sometimes it helps to understand why a person is unkind; usually its roots lie in the way they, themselves, were raised. If they came from a hot-tempered, abusive family, they are simply repeating the only techniques they've ever known. It doesn't justify it, but it explains it. Hurt and anger they feel from their own lost happiness is often misdirected at the people who are closest at hand.
3. Avoid self pity. It is a tool of the adversary, and leads to depression, retaliation, and even physical illness. Remember that this may be your trial in life, but others have their trials, too. They may be struggling with sins and situations you cannot see, yet which are just as challenging.
4. Surround yourself with loving people who respect you. Demand courteous treatment, and don't accept belittling or berating. You have spent far too much time as the “whipping boy,” and now it's time to stand up for yourself and insist on decency and civility.
5. Create your own loving home. None of us can control the home where we grew up, but we can control the home and family we create as adults. Break the chain of abuse and determine to pattern your “second family” after gospel principles.
6. Don't feel you must continue to accept your parents' definitions of you. When we are commanded to honor our parents, it doesn't mean to obey them if they want you to sell drugs, or keep quiet about crimes they're committing, or keep their abuses a secret. To honor our parents, we improve upon their examples and lead as Christlike a life as we can, polishing their reputation and ours, living as nobly as possible. If they are not worthy of emulation, we can look to others as role models.
7. Whenever someone is cruel to you, remember that you are in a far better position than they are. It is always better to be the one to whom evil was done, than the evil-doer. Be glad you do not treat people so unkindly, and let each example of hurt be a reminder that you would never stoop so low.
8. Find comfort in prayer. Every pain you have endured was felt by Christ in Gethsemane . He knows your heart intimately, and wants to heal you and help you move on. Allow Him in.
9. Study stories from the scriptures that teach us how to transcend poor parenting. Abraham's father was willing to sacrifice him to a false God, yet look at the spiritual giant Abraham became.
10. Remember that God loves you more than can be described. His love is more than enough to make up for any loss you've suffered. His love alone is sufficient for a sense of well-being, and the peace of mind all men seek. Bask in it, glory in it, and let it fill you with joy.
Listen to "The Joni Hilton Show" streaming live, weeknights 6-8 pm on www.KAHI.com Call 1-800-950-5244 for life/relationship advice.
Some time ago a sister in Relief Society shared that she absolutely cringes every time she hears the song, I Am a Child of God , because of the line, “has given me a loving home with parents kind and dear.” Her upbringing was anything but kind and dear, and she felt cheated of something everyone else seemed to have.
But this sister is hardly alone. Though it isn't always discussed, many others feel this same sense of loss, and even resentment, that they didn't come from “an ideal LDS family.” Yes, we hear lots of talks and testimonies expressing gratitude for wonderful parents—and may God bless those who truly are-- but there is a vast group who cannot echo these sentiments, and whose parents were neglectful, abusive, selfish, or destructive.
No one has the statistics on just what per cent of our population is truly “ideal,” but one need only to get intimately acquainted with other members to see that not all our families do everything right and live every commandment to the letter. Many in every ward are the “walking wounded,” survivors of terrible upbringings, struggling to make sense of why they had to endure innocence lost and mourning their unhappy childhoods.
My father was an LDS marriage counselor and often reminded folks that, despite having the recipe for happy living, LDS homes were nevertheless afflicted with all the same problems we see “in the world”: incest, beatings, threats, drug abuse, the gamut. Head-in-the- sand members would gasp and insist that certainly such sins were not among Latter-day Saints, but the reality is that these horrors do indeed afflict our culture, and will best be solved by facing them honestly, not by denying their existence.
Do we have fewer problems than non-LDS families? We hope so. LDS families are known for taking commitments seriously, for spending more time together than average, for loving and supporting one another, for teaching noble values, and for fostering closeness among extended relatives. We know our education rates are higher and our divorce rates are lower. But there is no way to measure perfect parenting, so we can only assume that our emphasis on family life is yielding healthy fruit for the most part. I think we all agree that, if you want to be a good parent, being a good LDS parent is your best shot.
So what can a member do, who's one of the ones who fell through the cracks, whose parents dropped the ball? What can you, as a Home or Visiting Teacher, impart to these members to give them hope and comfort?
Ten points come to mind:
1. Don't wait for cruel people to apologize. Generally when someone is capable of such meanness, they are not the type of person who later reflects and feels remorse leading to a heartfelt apology. Our charge is to forgive them regardless of whether they've said they're sorry. We need to forgive them for our own sake, so we can make spiritual progress. Don't let them keep you down by nursing a grudge or harboring resentment; then you've let them hurt you twice! Forgiving them doesn't mean you continue to let them heap anguish into your life; it means you have stopped hating them for it and have moved on.
2. Sometimes it helps to understand why a person is unkind; usually its roots lie in the way they, themselves, were raised. If they came from a hot-tempered, abusive family, they are simply repeating the only techniques they've ever known. It doesn't justify it, but it explains it. Hurt and anger they feel from their own lost happiness is often misdirected at the people who are closest at hand.
3. Avoid self pity. It is a tool of the adversary, and leads to depression, retaliation, and even physical illness. Remember that this may be your trial in life, but others have their trials, too. They may be struggling with sins and situations you cannot see, yet which are just as challenging.
4. Surround yourself with loving people who respect you. Demand courteous treatment, and don't accept belittling or berating. You have spent far too much time as the “whipping boy,” and now it's time to stand up for yourself and insist on decency and civility.
5. Create your own loving home. None of us can control the home where we grew up, but we can control the home and family we create as adults. Break the chain of abuse and determine to pattern your “second family” after gospel principles.
6. Don't feel you must continue to accept your parents' definitions of you. When we are commanded to honor our parents, it doesn't mean to obey them if they want you to sell drugs, or keep quiet about crimes they're committing, or keep their abuses a secret. To honor our parents, we improve upon their examples and lead as Christlike a life as we can, polishing their reputation and ours, living as nobly as possible. If they are not worthy of emulation, we can look to others as role models.
7. Whenever someone is cruel to you, remember that you are in a far better position than they are. It is always better to be the one to whom evil was done, than the evil-doer. Be glad you do not treat people so unkindly, and let each example of hurt be a reminder that you would never stoop so low.
8. Find comfort in prayer. Every pain you have endured was felt by Christ in Gethsemane . He knows your heart intimately, and wants to heal you and help you move on. Allow Him in.
9. Study stories from the scriptures that teach us how to transcend poor parenting. Abraham's father was willing to sacrifice him to a false God, yet look at the spiritual giant Abraham became.
10. Remember that God loves you more than can be described. His love is more than enough to make up for any loss you've suffered. His love alone is sufficient for a sense of well-being, and the peace of mind all men seek. Bask in it, glory in it, and let it fill you with joy.
Listen to "The Joni Hilton Show" streaming live, weeknights 6-8 pm on www.KAHI.com Call 1-800-950-5244 for life/relationship advice.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
FRIENDS
Lean on Me
In an age when researchers search the mind-body connection, it’s no surprise that studies have attempted to find the impact of friendship on health. And the impact certainly exists: people with strong networks of friends have better emotional health; stronger immune systems; better eating, exercising, and sleep habits; longer life expectancy, especially during life-threatening illnesses; and lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol, which has adverse health effects.
Conversely, those without strong connections tend to have a lower life expectancy, higher blood pressure, and higher incidence of obesity.
While the benefits from friendship require time, they don’t require as much as you think. Quick telephone calls or e-mails contribute significantly to a strong network. And even if your spouse or sibling is your “best friend,” time with them doesn’t count as friend time to your body: friends offer a different kind of support than family or a partner does. So take an afternoon off from laundry and spend time with your bosom buddies. You never know—it could save your life.
LDS Living, Jan/Feb 2009
In an age when researchers search the mind-body connection, it’s no surprise that studies have attempted to find the impact of friendship on health. And the impact certainly exists: people with strong networks of friends have better emotional health; stronger immune systems; better eating, exercising, and sleep habits; longer life expectancy, especially during life-threatening illnesses; and lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol, which has adverse health effects.
Conversely, those without strong connections tend to have a lower life expectancy, higher blood pressure, and higher incidence of obesity.
While the benefits from friendship require time, they don’t require as much as you think. Quick telephone calls or e-mails contribute significantly to a strong network. And even if your spouse or sibling is your “best friend,” time with them doesn’t count as friend time to your body: friends offer a different kind of support than family or a partner does. So take an afternoon off from laundry and spend time with your bosom buddies. You never know—it could save your life.
LDS Living, Jan/Feb 2009
The Personality of Friendship
I found this article today. Thought I would share it.
http://www.ldslivingmagazine.com/articles/show/1852
Funny how I would find it after I shared my friend journal entry.
It was very interesting. I don't agree with everything, but that is okay. I still think its a fun read. I liked the end of it the best. Friendship is good for your body. Friendship doesn't take a whole lot of time. Emails, phone calls, get together for lunches, etc.
People used to think Debbie and I were inseparable. The Fact of the matter was we hardly saw each other. We didn't see each other on a regular basis until we started Weight Watchers and then that was once a week on Tuesdays. We would then venture out and do our Visiting Teaching. I would usually set up the appointments and make the reminder calls to the ladies. I would usually make or buy a goody for most of them. I would usually drive, and we would just travel to the sister's houses and catch up on our weeks and our days.
We hardly ever saw each other in church, we were usually at opposite sides of the building. The only time we worked together in a calling was when I was Stake Camp Director and I asked if she could be my Stake Camp Assistant Director. That was 2 or 3 years.
We grew up totally different. Her family is tight nit, mine is "the further away the better we are". If my family can get together for more than 10 hours and not fight its a miracle (actually that means some of us are on Zoloft, ha ha....and I wished it was me!)
She married in the temple after they both served their missons. She had her babies right after the other. I got married at the Elks Club outside to a non-member. I had Adrienne, took her to the temple with us when she was 3 and our babies are spread apart. 18, 14, 11, 3.
What I guess I'm trying to say is that we were polar opposite. She was told by one of the family members to watch out for me. I was only in it for myself. That I would steal the show, that I HAD to be center of attention. That is not true. I can sit in the back seat. But if no one wants it, I'll take the front. ha ha! I try to run my life by the spirit, and I have learned that not very many people like that. Its intimidating. Heavenly Father keeps reminding me "Shanon, you intimidate people"
What do I do with that information?
October of 2007 the spirit told me that my friendship would end with Debbie. I thought it was the craziest "thought" I had ever heard. I was also told that it would end by one of the kids. That was impossible. I loved her kids. I thought she loved mine. We always said that is anything happened to the other that we would take the kids and raise them ourselves. It was just crazy talk. Over the months though I could sense something. It was a scary feeling. I could feel the distance happening. We fought it. I kept praying about these feelings. The Lord kept telling me.
It happened. August 08. I will call it D day!
Shai was having some issues with one of the kids. Her phone was being taken out of her purse and the icons and ring tones and alarms were being messed with. She found her self getting woke up at 2:30 am. That was not funny to me or Shai. Especially since seminary is at 6:45, and you share a room with someone else. I witnessed this yw kneeing Shai in the butt all the way from the stage entrance to the Kitchen. That didn't sit right with me. Things were changing at school. Tensions were rising. You could see that these girls were choosing to be opposites. I believe its hard to grow up in the church and see your friends be "different" not necessarily wrong, but different. Shai felt it was time for her to break ties. I knew what she was feeling, I had felt the same way. Debbie and I were growing too different. I wasn't being the happy friend like I should be. I felt weighted down by something. I'm still not sure exactly what it was.
Shai called me at seminary one morning asking me for a ride, she didn't feel comfortable riding to school with some kids. I took her to school. Asked her if I needed to come in and walk her to her locker. (Love and support.) Sure mom, thanks! We walked in. I saw this young lady and I could feel my ears turning red. She was giving me dirty looks, or it was the deer in the headlights look I'm not quite sure. I did stop in the hall, I did say...---------, DO NOT MAKE SHAI'S LIFE A LIVING HELL IN HIGH SCHOOL, LIKE YOU DID IN MIDDLE SCHOOL. (things got rough in middle school, if this YW wasn't happy, no one was happy. If Shai was being an eeyore, everyone knew it) I was surprised at the maturity this young lady had. I think that toned me down. I wasn't looking for a fight. I wasn't there for confrontation. I was there to walk Shai to her locker and get her to her first class, but there was an opportunity. It looked like this young lady was giving me dirty looks and I was going to stop them. I did.
I took a deep breath and proceeded to correct her on her behaviors towards Shai... like, 'please don't take her phone out of her purse, a purse is personal. How would you like it?' "It wouldn't bother me" (nice come back). I confronted her on some of the kids she was hanging with, she basically told me she wasn't doing that. Making Shai even madder because she felt this young lady was lying. I ended up saying that the Lord sees all. I didn't want to come across as a bully and I apologized to her if it seemed like I was. I just wanted the air to be cleared and then her and Shai could be better friends. And that she really needed to quit hitting Shai and just be a better person and be the Mia maid president that Heavenly Father needed her to be. I said that I loved her and apologized again if I scared her or made her feel uncomfortable. There was a teacher standing about 5 feet from us. If I was rude or confrontational I believe she would have asked me to leave. But I was talking like we were friends. We were. I had been her Mia maid teacher for a year. Debbie and I have been friends for 13 years. I would do anything to destroy her. That is not in my nature. I will stand for truth and righteousness. I do have the spirit of discernment when I am being lied to, I know. Again, that is on her agency, and not mine.
I left. Got in my van. About 3 minutes later the spirit said to me...That was the end of your friendship with Debbie. This is what I meant when I told you it would be over. I was okay with that. Or was I? I fought it. I called her asking if we were going to go to the temple in 2 days, if she was driving. Are we going Visiting Teaching? I called 15 times that day. She never called me back. She never spoke to me again! Saturday I ended up picking up the temple goers and going.
Sunday came and I was devastated physically, mentally, and spiritually. Someone told me that Debbie was "done with me". I prayed about what I should do. How I should feel. The spirit told me "let her go" "set her free". So I did. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done.
I have a testimony that God makes everything good. Even when bad people do bad things to you, God will make it right. God has blessed me. The gates of Heaven have opened up to me and I have been blessed. Physically I am healthier. Spiritually I am the same, hoping to continue to gain more. Mentally I still struggle. Most of my struggle was NOT knowing what I did that was so wrong for her to NOT speak to me for 5 months.
Sunday the silence was broken and now I know. I can only wonder what her daughter said to her to have her hurt. I didn't say anything to her daughter that I didn't already share with Debbie before the school incident (I talked her earlier that morning before Just for Ladies). Debbie did say to me..."the only thing you accomplished by going to the school to confront ------was you got it off your chest!!!!" That puzzled me. I pondered on that statement all night. I finally took it to prayer. God said to me...It accomplished what it was supposed to accomplish. Everything I had been praying for.
1. A new start 2. New friends 3. A new physical self, you got yourself back to weight watchers. 4. Shai had the freedom to find new friends and be blessed by old friends (who were afraid because they were afraid of this yw) 5. Your heart is mended. You haven't had heart problem since. I thought it was the mitral valve regurgitation, but it seems now it was anxiety attacks. WHO KNEW? 6. She is flying in her calling. She is not in your shadow. LIFE IS GOOD! 7. You and Ron are closer!
I was blessed to have Debbie in my life. Our lives were opposite, but for the time, they attracted. I would help more physically, and she helped me mentally. She let me talk and ramble and I would go and help her with the kids, or clean, or lend money, etc. It was all good! Somewhere along the way God needed things to change, and I'm relishing in that change. I hope she is too. She looks good. She is in the YW program now and that changes you too. To stand and say that YW theme every week changes a person, or at least it should and it did change me. Now I travel around in the Stake for Primary and that changes me too. The spirit is so strong in the primary room. I don't see why teachers are begging to be in there. May God soften their hearts!
Friends.....I need them! I am blessed by them. I have always been blessed to have a best friend no matter where I was planted. I have prayed for friends, and I have received. I thank you if you are ONE of my MANY friends who help me on this journey. Heaven knows I wouldn't be the person I am today if it wasn't for FRIENDS!!!!
Past, Present, and FUTURE!!
http://www.ldslivingmagazine.com/articles/show/1852
Funny how I would find it after I shared my friend journal entry.
It was very interesting. I don't agree with everything, but that is okay. I still think its a fun read. I liked the end of it the best. Friendship is good for your body. Friendship doesn't take a whole lot of time. Emails, phone calls, get together for lunches, etc.
People used to think Debbie and I were inseparable. The Fact of the matter was we hardly saw each other. We didn't see each other on a regular basis until we started Weight Watchers and then that was once a week on Tuesdays. We would then venture out and do our Visiting Teaching. I would usually set up the appointments and make the reminder calls to the ladies. I would usually make or buy a goody for most of them. I would usually drive, and we would just travel to the sister's houses and catch up on our weeks and our days.
We hardly ever saw each other in church, we were usually at opposite sides of the building. The only time we worked together in a calling was when I was Stake Camp Director and I asked if she could be my Stake Camp Assistant Director. That was 2 or 3 years.
We grew up totally different. Her family is tight nit, mine is "the further away the better we are". If my family can get together for more than 10 hours and not fight its a miracle (actually that means some of us are on Zoloft, ha ha....and I wished it was me!)
She married in the temple after they both served their missons. She had her babies right after the other. I got married at the Elks Club outside to a non-member. I had Adrienne, took her to the temple with us when she was 3 and our babies are spread apart. 18, 14, 11, 3.
What I guess I'm trying to say is that we were polar opposite. She was told by one of the family members to watch out for me. I was only in it for myself. That I would steal the show, that I HAD to be center of attention. That is not true. I can sit in the back seat. But if no one wants it, I'll take the front. ha ha! I try to run my life by the spirit, and I have learned that not very many people like that. Its intimidating. Heavenly Father keeps reminding me "Shanon, you intimidate people"
What do I do with that information?
October of 2007 the spirit told me that my friendship would end with Debbie. I thought it was the craziest "thought" I had ever heard. I was also told that it would end by one of the kids. That was impossible. I loved her kids. I thought she loved mine. We always said that is anything happened to the other that we would take the kids and raise them ourselves. It was just crazy talk. Over the months though I could sense something. It was a scary feeling. I could feel the distance happening. We fought it. I kept praying about these feelings. The Lord kept telling me.
It happened. August 08. I will call it D day!
Shai was having some issues with one of the kids. Her phone was being taken out of her purse and the icons and ring tones and alarms were being messed with. She found her self getting woke up at 2:30 am. That was not funny to me or Shai. Especially since seminary is at 6:45, and you share a room with someone else. I witnessed this yw kneeing Shai in the butt all the way from the stage entrance to the Kitchen. That didn't sit right with me. Things were changing at school. Tensions were rising. You could see that these girls were choosing to be opposites. I believe its hard to grow up in the church and see your friends be "different" not necessarily wrong, but different. Shai felt it was time for her to break ties. I knew what she was feeling, I had felt the same way. Debbie and I were growing too different. I wasn't being the happy friend like I should be. I felt weighted down by something. I'm still not sure exactly what it was.
Shai called me at seminary one morning asking me for a ride, she didn't feel comfortable riding to school with some kids. I took her to school. Asked her if I needed to come in and walk her to her locker. (Love and support.) Sure mom, thanks! We walked in. I saw this young lady and I could feel my ears turning red. She was giving me dirty looks, or it was the deer in the headlights look I'm not quite sure. I did stop in the hall, I did say...---------, DO NOT MAKE SHAI'S LIFE A LIVING HELL IN HIGH SCHOOL, LIKE YOU DID IN MIDDLE SCHOOL. (things got rough in middle school, if this YW wasn't happy, no one was happy. If Shai was being an eeyore, everyone knew it) I was surprised at the maturity this young lady had. I think that toned me down. I wasn't looking for a fight. I wasn't there for confrontation. I was there to walk Shai to her locker and get her to her first class, but there was an opportunity. It looked like this young lady was giving me dirty looks and I was going to stop them. I did.
I took a deep breath and proceeded to correct her on her behaviors towards Shai... like, 'please don't take her phone out of her purse, a purse is personal. How would you like it?' "It wouldn't bother me" (nice come back). I confronted her on some of the kids she was hanging with, she basically told me she wasn't doing that. Making Shai even madder because she felt this young lady was lying. I ended up saying that the Lord sees all. I didn't want to come across as a bully and I apologized to her if it seemed like I was. I just wanted the air to be cleared and then her and Shai could be better friends. And that she really needed to quit hitting Shai and just be a better person and be the Mia maid president that Heavenly Father needed her to be. I said that I loved her and apologized again if I scared her or made her feel uncomfortable. There was a teacher standing about 5 feet from us. If I was rude or confrontational I believe she would have asked me to leave. But I was talking like we were friends. We were. I had been her Mia maid teacher for a year. Debbie and I have been friends for 13 years. I would do anything to destroy her. That is not in my nature. I will stand for truth and righteousness. I do have the spirit of discernment when I am being lied to, I know. Again, that is on her agency, and not mine.
I left. Got in my van. About 3 minutes later the spirit said to me...That was the end of your friendship with Debbie. This is what I meant when I told you it would be over. I was okay with that. Or was I? I fought it. I called her asking if we were going to go to the temple in 2 days, if she was driving. Are we going Visiting Teaching? I called 15 times that day. She never called me back. She never spoke to me again! Saturday I ended up picking up the temple goers and going.
Sunday came and I was devastated physically, mentally, and spiritually. Someone told me that Debbie was "done with me". I prayed about what I should do. How I should feel. The spirit told me "let her go" "set her free". So I did. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done.
I have a testimony that God makes everything good. Even when bad people do bad things to you, God will make it right. God has blessed me. The gates of Heaven have opened up to me and I have been blessed. Physically I am healthier. Spiritually I am the same, hoping to continue to gain more. Mentally I still struggle. Most of my struggle was NOT knowing what I did that was so wrong for her to NOT speak to me for 5 months.
Sunday the silence was broken and now I know. I can only wonder what her daughter said to her to have her hurt. I didn't say anything to her daughter that I didn't already share with Debbie before the school incident (I talked her earlier that morning before Just for Ladies). Debbie did say to me..."the only thing you accomplished by going to the school to confront ------was you got it off your chest!!!!" That puzzled me. I pondered on that statement all night. I finally took it to prayer. God said to me...It accomplished what it was supposed to accomplish. Everything I had been praying for.
1. A new start 2. New friends 3. A new physical self, you got yourself back to weight watchers. 4. Shai had the freedom to find new friends and be blessed by old friends (who were afraid because they were afraid of this yw) 5. Your heart is mended. You haven't had heart problem since. I thought it was the mitral valve regurgitation, but it seems now it was anxiety attacks. WHO KNEW? 6. She is flying in her calling. She is not in your shadow. LIFE IS GOOD! 7. You and Ron are closer!
I was blessed to have Debbie in my life. Our lives were opposite, but for the time, they attracted. I would help more physically, and she helped me mentally. She let me talk and ramble and I would go and help her with the kids, or clean, or lend money, etc. It was all good! Somewhere along the way God needed things to change, and I'm relishing in that change. I hope she is too. She looks good. She is in the YW program now and that changes you too. To stand and say that YW theme every week changes a person, or at least it should and it did change me. Now I travel around in the Stake for Primary and that changes me too. The spirit is so strong in the primary room. I don't see why teachers are begging to be in there. May God soften their hearts!
Friends.....I need them! I am blessed by them. I have always been blessed to have a best friend no matter where I was planted. I have prayed for friends, and I have received. I thank you if you are ONE of my MANY friends who help me on this journey. Heaven knows I wouldn't be the person I am today if it wasn't for FRIENDS!!!!
Past, Present, and FUTURE!!
Thursday, January 22, 2009
The importance of Journaling
It was back in March when I discovered LDSJOURNAL.COM.
I have always enjoyed journaling. I once heard President Kimball tell us that journaling was important for the mind, heart and soul. I have been journaling ever since. I was 12 when I heard his "commandment" to me. I have about 30 or more journals.
I was on ldsjournal.com and was introduced to Adam Garza's journal song. Beautiful. It just teaches the importance of journaling.
Sometimes I feel that what I write is unimportant. I do it anyway.
I was reading over my ldsjournal.com today and I was freaked out by what I saw. I mentioned a few things that I wanted to see change in my life. I had a very strong desire to more good friends.
It was like a prayer in print. Those things have come true. I feel very blessed by those whom the Lord has placed in my life the past 10 months. From Work out buddies, to email friends to people I get to be in touch with on Facebook, to my new visiting teaching ladies. I know its because He saw and heard my desire.
Another example: I was struggling a few years back with my marriage and my exfiance was calling me. I seriously contemplated leaving my husband for this man. The spirit directed me to go and seek out my journal. I pictured exactly where that journal was, in the back of my closet. Not an easy task to get to.
I was reading all the entries of the time that him and I were dating. It was amazing to have the words come to life. Those same feelings that I had in 1988 came so real. I was so grateful I wrote almost everything down. Not even thinking of the impact these words would be in MY future.
As I read the hurt feelings boiled up in my heart and my mind. I remembered exactly why I broke off the engagement. I feel very blessed that God gave me my own words to guide me to NOT leaving Ron for Chad. At the end of that journal I remember what I wrote.
"Dear Father, you know who I am. You know I am good. You know I struggle with many things. You know who is best for me. Will you please send someone to help me out of this Dark hole that I am in?"
2 weeks later I asked Ron out on a date. 5 months later we were married.
I know people change. But the Lord spoke to me again. Reminded me of Why I married Ron and that if we kept our eye on the eternal prize we could make it.
I have a lot of journal testimonies, but those are the two I feel impressed to share.
So I admonish us all to continue to write even though it doesn't seem important.
Adams song describes it all:
Lyrics to “Made of Moments” by Adam Garza
When I wake up, and the sun is shinin' on my faceA brand new day calls my name
I've got to find my keys and start on my way, hey
So many things can happen in one day
Maybe today, she'll say, she wants to marry me
So many things can happen in one year
Oh did ya hear, that song, what's on the news
Yea, my brother's coming home soon
Life is made of moments, a hundred years slip through the sands of time
I wanna remember, this time
If life is worth living, life is worth recording
So I got to thinkin’ if today my life should pass away
How much of me will have remained
Should I have taken one small moment each day
To etch in gold my life for always, so I wont fade
Life is made of moments a hundred years slip through the sands of time
I wanna remember, this time, this time
Life is sharing moments, of all these years I hope to keep this one in mind
I wanna remember, I wanna remember
The late night camping scene when all were fast asleep
My first new set of wheels, I tried so hard not to speed
It meant so much to me what grandpa said to me
The night before he walked into the light
The day I saw the eyes of my love dressed in white
The sound of life, the sound of my son’s first cry
Life keeps rolling on, with memories forever gone
And I just want to hold on, hold on
Oh yea hold on, hold on
If life is worth living, life is worth recording, now
© 2006 - 2008 LDSJournal, LTD. All rights reserved.
I have always enjoyed journaling. I once heard President Kimball tell us that journaling was important for the mind, heart and soul. I have been journaling ever since. I was 12 when I heard his "commandment" to me. I have about 30 or more journals.
I was on ldsjournal.com and was introduced to Adam Garza's journal song. Beautiful. It just teaches the importance of journaling.
Sometimes I feel that what I write is unimportant. I do it anyway.
I was reading over my ldsjournal.com today and I was freaked out by what I saw. I mentioned a few things that I wanted to see change in my life. I had a very strong desire to more good friends.
It was like a prayer in print. Those things have come true. I feel very blessed by those whom the Lord has placed in my life the past 10 months. From Work out buddies, to email friends to people I get to be in touch with on Facebook, to my new visiting teaching ladies. I know its because He saw and heard my desire.
Another example: I was struggling a few years back with my marriage and my exfiance was calling me. I seriously contemplated leaving my husband for this man. The spirit directed me to go and seek out my journal. I pictured exactly where that journal was, in the back of my closet. Not an easy task to get to.
I was reading all the entries of the time that him and I were dating. It was amazing to have the words come to life. Those same feelings that I had in 1988 came so real. I was so grateful I wrote almost everything down. Not even thinking of the impact these words would be in MY future.
As I read the hurt feelings boiled up in my heart and my mind. I remembered exactly why I broke off the engagement. I feel very blessed that God gave me my own words to guide me to NOT leaving Ron for Chad. At the end of that journal I remember what I wrote.
"Dear Father, you know who I am. You know I am good. You know I struggle with many things. You know who is best for me. Will you please send someone to help me out of this Dark hole that I am in?"
2 weeks later I asked Ron out on a date. 5 months later we were married.
I know people change. But the Lord spoke to me again. Reminded me of Why I married Ron and that if we kept our eye on the eternal prize we could make it.
I have a lot of journal testimonies, but those are the two I feel impressed to share.
So I admonish us all to continue to write even though it doesn't seem important.
Adams song describes it all:
Lyrics to “Made of Moments” by Adam Garza
When I wake up, and the sun is shinin' on my faceA brand new day calls my name
I've got to find my keys and start on my way, hey
So many things can happen in one day
Maybe today, she'll say, she wants to marry me
So many things can happen in one year
Oh did ya hear, that song, what's on the news
Yea, my brother's coming home soon
Life is made of moments, a hundred years slip through the sands of time
I wanna remember, this time
If life is worth living, life is worth recording
So I got to thinkin’ if today my life should pass away
How much of me will have remained
Should I have taken one small moment each day
To etch in gold my life for always, so I wont fade
Life is made of moments a hundred years slip through the sands of time
I wanna remember, this time, this time
Life is sharing moments, of all these years I hope to keep this one in mind
I wanna remember, I wanna remember
The late night camping scene when all were fast asleep
My first new set of wheels, I tried so hard not to speed
It meant so much to me what grandpa said to me
The night before he walked into the light
The day I saw the eyes of my love dressed in white
The sound of life, the sound of my son’s first cry
Life keeps rolling on, with memories forever gone
And I just want to hold on, hold on
Oh yea hold on, hold on
If life is worth living, life is worth recording, now
© 2006 - 2008 LDSJournal, LTD. All rights reserved.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
A lot going through my mind right now.
What is new.
I have had a couple people ask me not to move from Kearney. Some people in the community and some people in the Kearney Ward. Has my emotions and thoughts running wild. Saturday the kids and I looked online at the Hastings Housing situation. There is nothing that sticks into our minds. I am tempted to look at Kearney housing now.
I want to tell Heavenly Father that I am grateful for the beautiful house that I live in. I hope that my taking care of it on a daily basis shows my love and appreciation for it. I hope me trying to raise my children and other people’s children shows that I do love and respect all that is given me. It does seem to close in around us sometimes. Over the summer there were a lot of kids running in and out. We were all safe, but it does get a little overwhelming. I worried about some of the little ones when the construction seemed to go on for days at a time. No one was hurt and all is well and done now.
I don’t know if that is what it feels like in a real home or not. I have only lived in an apartment or “trailer” my whole married life. I have felt very blessed wherever I have lived. I am not HOUSE poor, that is for sure, ha ha! My children haven’t gone without because of the house payment. I truly feel like the Lord has blessed me my whole life with the things that we stand in need of. Ron’s family is in aw that we can survive and very well, on our income of 32,000.00 a year. Give or take a few tax breaks here and there. I gross about less than 20,000.00 with the daycare, thank goodness for tax right offs. Ron on average made less than 30,000.00 with working at Coleman, that was with overtime.
The main reason why we need to look into a house now is Ron needs a garage. This chemical that he uses needs to have a nice warm place or it freezes. I told Ron to look into renting a garage, he told me that most rental garages are NOT heated or insulated . Maybe we need to look into that further.
With Nostra Damus prediction of 2012 the world is going to come to an end, maybe we will just tight. Ha ha. (don’t know if I spelled that right, oh well)( I guess the History Channel is showing this Armegaden program, it has some people squirming, ha ha)
We live in scary times right now. We see the tempest raging. We feel that satan is raging and using different tools to get the kids. My kids are actually asking for FHE now. It makes my heart happy. We tried to get a lesson in last night but we were all so busy talking about how our week went and what was up for this week we had to close so we could get ready for bed. It was funny!
I invite the kids to FHE now. I don’t demand it. If you don’t want to come to FHE you can go to your room or bed. It’s been fun. We don’t do a 40 minute lesson. We pull an idea out of jar and we go with it. I think we got the topics from theideadoor.com I think I will make those for my V.T. ladies for Valentine’s day or mother’s day.
I lot on my mind. A lot to pray about. Where does God want me? Where do my kids need to be so they can get the best education. Not just math, but life.
What is new.
I have had a couple people ask me not to move from Kearney. Some people in the community and some people in the Kearney Ward. Has my emotions and thoughts running wild. Saturday the kids and I looked online at the Hastings Housing situation. There is nothing that sticks into our minds. I am tempted to look at Kearney housing now.
I want to tell Heavenly Father that I am grateful for the beautiful house that I live in. I hope that my taking care of it on a daily basis shows my love and appreciation for it. I hope me trying to raise my children and other people’s children shows that I do love and respect all that is given me. It does seem to close in around us sometimes. Over the summer there were a lot of kids running in and out. We were all safe, but it does get a little overwhelming. I worried about some of the little ones when the construction seemed to go on for days at a time. No one was hurt and all is well and done now.
I don’t know if that is what it feels like in a real home or not. I have only lived in an apartment or “trailer” my whole married life. I have felt very blessed wherever I have lived. I am not HOUSE poor, that is for sure, ha ha! My children haven’t gone without because of the house payment. I truly feel like the Lord has blessed me my whole life with the things that we stand in need of. Ron’s family is in aw that we can survive and very well, on our income of 32,000.00 a year. Give or take a few tax breaks here and there. I gross about less than 20,000.00 with the daycare, thank goodness for tax right offs. Ron on average made less than 30,000.00 with working at Coleman, that was with overtime.
The main reason why we need to look into a house now is Ron needs a garage. This chemical that he uses needs to have a nice warm place or it freezes. I told Ron to look into renting a garage, he told me that most rental garages are NOT heated or insulated . Maybe we need to look into that further.
With Nostra Damus prediction of 2012 the world is going to come to an end, maybe we will just tight. Ha ha. (don’t know if I spelled that right, oh well)( I guess the History Channel is showing this Armegaden program, it has some people squirming, ha ha)
We live in scary times right now. We see the tempest raging. We feel that satan is raging and using different tools to get the kids. My kids are actually asking for FHE now. It makes my heart happy. We tried to get a lesson in last night but we were all so busy talking about how our week went and what was up for this week we had to close so we could get ready for bed. It was funny!
I invite the kids to FHE now. I don’t demand it. If you don’t want to come to FHE you can go to your room or bed. It’s been fun. We don’t do a 40 minute lesson. We pull an idea out of jar and we go with it. I think we got the topics from theideadoor.com I think I will make those for my V.T. ladies for Valentine’s day or mother’s day.
I lot on my mind. A lot to pray about. Where does God want me? Where do my kids need to be so they can get the best education. Not just math, but life.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
PMS......ramblings
Some say its real. Some don't. I don't believe I had this as a teen. I was the only girl with 4 brothers. They were annoying all the time and I voiced it. That is NOT PMS. or is it?
Can Someone Tell me WHY there is PMS? If there is PMS?
I'm puzzled as to the why. Cuz I am somewhat a believer in it. I will have days that I look at myself and say...Did you really say that? Or did you really MEAN what you said?
I cried at almost everything today. I cried when My Dentist was mean to me. I cried at the fact that I had to spend money on prescriptions, because I don't get paid until friday. I cried when Ron asked me if I needed money for said "scripts". I cried when the cold air hit my teeth at 6:30 in the morning. I cried when I saw Loretta's Bucket list. I cried at Em's posts about Kenner. I cried at LJ's pictures of here grand baby's. I cried when I read Rhonda's discovery. I cried when I cut the onions for the veggie soup. I cried when the pain of my face got too much to bear. I cried thinking of David in pain from his car accident.
I hate it. I love it. I love a good cry. Sometimes I don't always like when or why I'm crying but I do love how I feel afterwards.
I hate that I stand up for myself because maybe I should just "let it slide" like everyone else around me does. (well, except Shai, she is a bit tight, ha ha) I love it when I stand up for myself. I finally have the "nerve" to do it. I always wanted to tell people what I needed to. Like the Dentist today. I went in, I don't have insurance. I'm hoping she'll guarantee her work, ha ha. She comes in and and I say... You know, for the record, I did ask you to pull this. (now its absessed, and they have to root canal it or pull it) I did NOT do raspberries, but she sure acted like it. "Well, I pulled everyone's teeth that wanted them pulled they wouldn't have any teeth. blah blah blah is all I heard after I seen her little attitude come out. I believe I had the right to say...Remember me, remember me wanting this half rotten tooth OUT of my mouth. I know my mouth, I know its not worth saving, this has happened before.
Does it get me anywhere? I'm not sure. Maybe it just gets me LONELY when I'm older because people won't want to be around me cuz I'm a crusty crab.
I find it funny the one thing that I remember "receiving" in R.Y. was there are 3 kinds of people. Passive (you let people walk all over you). Aggressive (always violently demanding your way, basically), and Assertive (letting people know what you need...nicely).
I consider myself Assertive most of the time. The problem in my world is....they only listen when I'm aggressive. Sucks for them, ha ha! Sucks for me too, because then I feel guilty.
P.M.S. Is it just the Legal Way Women can get away with being Assertive/aggressive?
hmmmmmm
Food for thought
Can Someone Tell me WHY there is PMS? If there is PMS?
I'm puzzled as to the why. Cuz I am somewhat a believer in it. I will have days that I look at myself and say...Did you really say that? Or did you really MEAN what you said?
I cried at almost everything today. I cried when My Dentist was mean to me. I cried at the fact that I had to spend money on prescriptions, because I don't get paid until friday. I cried when Ron asked me if I needed money for said "scripts". I cried when the cold air hit my teeth at 6:30 in the morning. I cried when I saw Loretta's Bucket list. I cried at Em's posts about Kenner. I cried at LJ's pictures of here grand baby's. I cried when I read Rhonda's discovery. I cried when I cut the onions for the veggie soup. I cried when the pain of my face got too much to bear. I cried thinking of David in pain from his car accident.
I hate it. I love it. I love a good cry. Sometimes I don't always like when or why I'm crying but I do love how I feel afterwards.
I hate that I stand up for myself because maybe I should just "let it slide" like everyone else around me does. (well, except Shai, she is a bit tight, ha ha) I love it when I stand up for myself. I finally have the "nerve" to do it. I always wanted to tell people what I needed to. Like the Dentist today. I went in, I don't have insurance. I'm hoping she'll guarantee her work, ha ha. She comes in and and I say... You know, for the record, I did ask you to pull this. (now its absessed, and they have to root canal it or pull it) I did NOT do raspberries, but she sure acted like it. "Well, I pulled everyone's teeth that wanted them pulled they wouldn't have any teeth. blah blah blah is all I heard after I seen her little attitude come out. I believe I had the right to say...Remember me, remember me wanting this half rotten tooth OUT of my mouth. I know my mouth, I know its not worth saving, this has happened before.
Does it get me anywhere? I'm not sure. Maybe it just gets me LONELY when I'm older because people won't want to be around me cuz I'm a crusty crab.
I find it funny the one thing that I remember "receiving" in R.Y. was there are 3 kinds of people. Passive (you let people walk all over you). Aggressive (always violently demanding your way, basically), and Assertive (letting people know what you need...nicely).
I consider myself Assertive most of the time. The problem in my world is....they only listen when I'm aggressive. Sucks for them, ha ha! Sucks for me too, because then I feel guilty.
P.M.S. Is it just the Legal Way Women can get away with being Assertive/aggressive?
hmmmmmm
Food for thought
Monday, January 12, 2009
Judging
I was talking to Adrienne about a young mom heading off to BYU-IDAHO to go to college. She quickly said...She can't do that, it would be too hard. I said, Many people do it, like Sarah, Kari, and Jenn (just to name a few moms that I baby sit for). I said... You don't think that what David is going through is hard. Do you think he thought he would be laying in a hospital bed not able to use his leg? That is a hard thing to go through. (my point was...people do what they have to do!)
She got all pizzy! Why are you so judgmental?
WHAT?
Where did that come from?
I wasn't judging the fact that David found himself on the other side of the highway on a headon collision and in the hospital suffering, Judging.
I was simply making an analogy, like the Savior did (parables?)
She saw it as judging. You are always pointing your finger and saying see what she does, look at what they are doing, etc.
Whatever girl!
DON'T EVER think I am judging. I am a people watcher. I try and learn from other people. If I saw SARAH putting her finger in the hot stove, that was a sign for me NOT to do that myself. I was NOT a follower. I saw plenty of people getting stoned and that was something I didn't want my life to be full of.
IS THAT JUDGING?
NO!
Judging to me is...Someone who puts someone down to make themselves look better.
We have a lady in the Ward who calls you up, or tells you straight up, or tells someone else that YOU ARE A TERRIBLE MOM, or YOU ARE AN EMBARRASSMENT to your children and husband. And she will be SNOTTY and put her NOSE in the AIR so HIGH she will get a nose bleed. (Barely has any friends, cries about not having friends and then wonders why she doesn't have any friends. HELLO...YOU BIT THEM ALL!!! ARE YOU THAT BLIND LADY????)
That to me is judging.
Or someone needs to tell me I need to get my facts straight!
Any takers??? ha ha
She got all pizzy! Why are you so judgmental?
WHAT?
Where did that come from?
I wasn't judging the fact that David found himself on the other side of the highway on a headon collision and in the hospital suffering, Judging.
I was simply making an analogy, like the Savior did (parables?)
She saw it as judging. You are always pointing your finger and saying see what she does, look at what they are doing, etc.
Whatever girl!
DON'T EVER think I am judging. I am a people watcher. I try and learn from other people. If I saw SARAH putting her finger in the hot stove, that was a sign for me NOT to do that myself. I was NOT a follower. I saw plenty of people getting stoned and that was something I didn't want my life to be full of.
IS THAT JUDGING?
NO!
Judging to me is...Someone who puts someone down to make themselves look better.
We have a lady in the Ward who calls you up, or tells you straight up, or tells someone else that YOU ARE A TERRIBLE MOM, or YOU ARE AN EMBARRASSMENT to your children and husband. And she will be SNOTTY and put her NOSE in the AIR so HIGH she will get a nose bleed. (Barely has any friends, cries about not having friends and then wonders why she doesn't have any friends. HELLO...YOU BIT THEM ALL!!! ARE YOU THAT BLIND LADY????)
That to me is judging.
Or someone needs to tell me I need to get my facts straight!
Any takers??? ha ha
Friday, January 9, 2009
Monday was family home evening. I had had enough of the bickering, the fighting, the hollaring, the not listening and I attributed it to our diet. I asked Shai if she would give FHE on nutrition. She found some great tips.
We started FHE with For the Beauty of the Earth Song. I didn't realize the beauty of that song.I asked who was ready to start eating better and getting healthy. All of us were on board but Adrienne. She was smug and smarty pants and decided she wanted to stay fat and get fatter. I wasn't impressed. I think next time we will have FHE without her. Yet it seems there is always someone who is being a jerk. (I once heard a statement "Family Home Argument!)
We weighed ourselves. Ron was 245, I was 190, Adrienne was __, Shai was_ , Justice was__ . We all were ready!
Tuesday morning I made out menu's that were healthier. This weekend will be the test.
Shai got a notebook for her and Justice to write down their points. I got online with weight watchers and I have been posting my points. Tuesday night at Weight Watchers the new leader named Lisa had an ending quote....ONLY TRACK ON THE DAYS YOU WANT TO LOSE WEIGHT.
Blanche resigned from Tuesday nights. So we shall see what Lisa can deliver.So far so good.
We are slowly detoxing from sugar. It is a slow process. I caught Ron and Justice into the taffy. I told them that would send them on an eating frenzy because it gets your insulin going and telling you that you are hungry. I was right. Now Ron is eating popcorn and Justice is eating cheese and crackers and its after 9:00 pm.
Thursday morning I was pulling up to the house from Just for Ladies and the spirit said to me Ask Kim W out for supper tonight..... OKAY!
I got busy and forgot to call. I was cleaning off my desk and I saw a picture of a little girl with blueberry on her face and she looked like M. (It was me at a year) I called Kim and invited her. She called me back after talking with J and said it was a go. 6:30 worked for her. SWEET!
I picked her up and we went to Whiskey Creek and we enjoyed a chopped sirloin, and baked potato, and salad. I then took her to 56th street gas station and got her a chocolate shake and me a mint shake. I started my sugar frenzy. I was disappointed in myself. I will try not to do that. I was doing so good.
I feel that if I keep my food in check, I'm able to hear the spirit. I know that, I have known that for so long. I know that Satan knows that! He can't get me with smoking, drinking, affairs, etc, he could get me with food. God is mightier than Satan, and Food!!!
This morning We were getting ready to go to Kensington in Hastings and the spirit said to me Call before you go! I got busy. I got lunch ready for the kids. I said to Ron, I thought about calling Kensington to see if its okay to come, he said, I felt that way too. So I called.
NOPE. Sherri said that the building has been quaraintined because of the flu. I told her I would call her next week to see if it would be okay.
I felt special that God would talk to me. Guide Ron and I. I felt it was God saying,
Keep doing it Shanon! Keep being healthy so I can speak to you.
We started FHE with For the Beauty of the Earth Song. I didn't realize the beauty of that song.I asked who was ready to start eating better and getting healthy. All of us were on board but Adrienne. She was smug and smarty pants and decided she wanted to stay fat and get fatter. I wasn't impressed. I think next time we will have FHE without her. Yet it seems there is always someone who is being a jerk. (I once heard a statement "Family Home Argument!)
We weighed ourselves. Ron was 245, I was 190, Adrienne was __, Shai was_ , Justice was__ . We all were ready!
Tuesday morning I made out menu's that were healthier. This weekend will be the test.
Shai got a notebook for her and Justice to write down their points. I got online with weight watchers and I have been posting my points. Tuesday night at Weight Watchers the new leader named Lisa had an ending quote....ONLY TRACK ON THE DAYS YOU WANT TO LOSE WEIGHT.
Blanche resigned from Tuesday nights. So we shall see what Lisa can deliver.So far so good.
We are slowly detoxing from sugar. It is a slow process. I caught Ron and Justice into the taffy. I told them that would send them on an eating frenzy because it gets your insulin going and telling you that you are hungry. I was right. Now Ron is eating popcorn and Justice is eating cheese and crackers and its after 9:00 pm.
Thursday morning I was pulling up to the house from Just for Ladies and the spirit said to me Ask Kim W out for supper tonight..... OKAY!
I got busy and forgot to call. I was cleaning off my desk and I saw a picture of a little girl with blueberry on her face and she looked like M. (It was me at a year) I called Kim and invited her. She called me back after talking with J and said it was a go. 6:30 worked for her. SWEET!
I picked her up and we went to Whiskey Creek and we enjoyed a chopped sirloin, and baked potato, and salad. I then took her to 56th street gas station and got her a chocolate shake and me a mint shake. I started my sugar frenzy. I was disappointed in myself. I will try not to do that. I was doing so good.
I feel that if I keep my food in check, I'm able to hear the spirit. I know that, I have known that for so long. I know that Satan knows that! He can't get me with smoking, drinking, affairs, etc, he could get me with food. God is mightier than Satan, and Food!!!
This morning We were getting ready to go to Kensington in Hastings and the spirit said to me Call before you go! I got busy. I got lunch ready for the kids. I said to Ron, I thought about calling Kensington to see if its okay to come, he said, I felt that way too. So I called.
NOPE. Sherri said that the building has been quaraintined because of the flu. I told her I would call her next week to see if it would be okay.
I felt special that God would talk to me. Guide Ron and I. I felt it was God saying,
Keep doing it Shanon! Keep being healthy so I can speak to you.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Filling Foods
Only Journal on the Days you want to lose weight!
That was my favorite quote from Weight Watchers last night.
Here is a poem that I want to live by too.
IF YOU BITE IT, WRITE IT
IF YOU DRINK IT, INK IT
IF YOU SNACK IT, TRACK IT
IF YO NIBBLE IT, SCRIBBLE IT
IF YOU STEAL IT, REVEAL IT
IF YOU SNEAK IT, LEAK IT
IF YOU HOG IT, LOG IT
IF YOU GRAB IT, BLAB IT
IF YOU INDULGE IT, DIVULGE IT
IF YOU LICK IT, BIC IT
GRAB YOUR PENCIL BEFORE YOU UTENSIL.
Januray 6, started a new Weight Watcher year for me.
I went to Weight Watchers fasting to know how to have health and strength and stamina to help me and my family.
January 5, 2009 Shai shared some healthfull hints for Family Home Evening.
I started off by saying "who all is tired of the triple chin?" most of us were ready. One was still in denial.
We got on the scale. We had all eaten a big supper and had a huge snack day. It was quite embarrassing to get on the scale 13 pounds heavier than the last week I weighed in. Now mind you I had my jeans and sweatshirt and makeup on (you know how much mascara weighs???)
I usually weigh in at WW in my biker shorts and the thinnest (without being too see through) shirt I can find. I have even gone to my scale and weighed myself and changed shirts just for the .2 loss.
I know. After so many years of WW I have to play a game with myself.
If I'm truly desperate I shave before I go. I take all my jewelry off and I spit out my gum.
If its a matter of FREE and 12.00 I'll do just about anything.
Tuesday morning came really early. I went to bed after midnight (still on the holiday schedule) and I was waken by Shai telling me it was 6:39. UGH. I got up and dressed and bundled up like it was 40 degree's below 0 and headed off to the church to take her to seminary.
Ventured off to Just for Ladies got my swimsuit on and flapped my jaws with my favorite excercise partner and flapped around in the swim ex for 30 minutes.
IT FELT WONDERFUL. Got myself dressed, and ready for the day. Was in such a good mood. Got home and did the laundry and cleaned up a few things. Read some emails and sat down and made out a menu for the week.
What are we having. I tried to pick FILLING FOODS.
Weight watchers had two plans. Core and Flex. Core was a list of less refined, wholesome foods that you could eat. There were a few rules like only eating potatoes, corn, brown rice, oatmeal, whole bran cereal, whole wheat spaghetti once a day. (so keep track of the carbs is my opinion)
You didn't have to write these items down, you just ate til you were satisfied. Well, I don't know when to stop. Actually I do, when I bend over and that "stuff" gets in your throat that is when I know I've eaten too much. So I would eat core foods and track the points. Stacia called it the FLOOR Plan. FLEX/CORE together. I lost 35 pounds doing that. Then I got lazy and just started eating what I wanted to.
Got me back up in weight too.
I started WW at 245 lbs. I got down to 160 lbs. (which life time at that time was 155). I stayed there for a week. Life was too stressful to stay there. Besides, I got pregnant with Karrea.
I had Karrea in November 2005, weighed in at 205. Felt GREAT!!!! Holidays came and went and so did my will power and I was stressed out!
I was too old to be a mommy to a new baby. I just couldn't grasp the concept of God giving me a baby to screw up again. Hadn't I screwed of 3 kids already??? I mean, really!!! I am the worst mom ever!
I cried almost every night!
I went back to weight watchers in January 2006, weighing in at 219. That is also when the Core plan was introduced. (if my memory serves me correctly, it was right around there anyway)
I jumped on the wagon. I lost 35 lbs by spring. IT FELT GREAT! The kids had lost 15 lbs too. We were fixing different fun foods. Like lots of stir fry. India (n) bread, Chicken Caeser Pizza, Brown rice haystacks, fat free muffins, etc.
Well, that is where we stand today. We are Back on the wagon.
My menu for this next week equals
Chicken Caeser Pizza
Easy Pasta E Faziole
Haystacks
Mexican Sloppy Joes
BBQ Chicken over baked potatoes
Angel hair wheat pasta Bolognese
BLT wraps (I get the low carb tortilla's, they take some getting used to, but I love them)
I'm going to try and attempt making my own pizza dough. The recipe calls for 4 1/2 cups of flour, but I'm going to sub 1 1/4 cup wheat flour. The points stay the same, but the fiber is upped.
I went shopping last night. I bought lots of fruit and frozen veggies, and good stuff! I'm excited. Wasn't excited about the bill, but the Lord will provide.
Now I need to go and find some wheat couscous. ha ha!!
I truly believe if I FILL up on these good foods my FEELINGS will be more in tact, and so will my family's.
That was my favorite quote from Weight Watchers last night.
Here is a poem that I want to live by too.
IF YOU BITE IT, WRITE IT
IF YOU DRINK IT, INK IT
IF YOU SNACK IT, TRACK IT
IF YO NIBBLE IT, SCRIBBLE IT
IF YOU STEAL IT, REVEAL IT
IF YOU SNEAK IT, LEAK IT
IF YOU HOG IT, LOG IT
IF YOU GRAB IT, BLAB IT
IF YOU INDULGE IT, DIVULGE IT
IF YOU LICK IT, BIC IT
GRAB YOUR PENCIL BEFORE YOU UTENSIL.
Januray 6, started a new Weight Watcher year for me.
I went to Weight Watchers fasting to know how to have health and strength and stamina to help me and my family.
January 5, 2009 Shai shared some healthfull hints for Family Home Evening.
I started off by saying "who all is tired of the triple chin?" most of us were ready. One was still in denial.
We got on the scale. We had all eaten a big supper and had a huge snack day. It was quite embarrassing to get on the scale 13 pounds heavier than the last week I weighed in. Now mind you I had my jeans and sweatshirt and makeup on (you know how much mascara weighs???)
I usually weigh in at WW in my biker shorts and the thinnest (without being too see through) shirt I can find. I have even gone to my scale and weighed myself and changed shirts just for the .2 loss.
I know. After so many years of WW I have to play a game with myself.
If I'm truly desperate I shave before I go. I take all my jewelry off and I spit out my gum.
If its a matter of FREE and 12.00 I'll do just about anything.
Tuesday morning came really early. I went to bed after midnight (still on the holiday schedule) and I was waken by Shai telling me it was 6:39. UGH. I got up and dressed and bundled up like it was 40 degree's below 0 and headed off to the church to take her to seminary.
Ventured off to Just for Ladies got my swimsuit on and flapped my jaws with my favorite excercise partner and flapped around in the swim ex for 30 minutes.
IT FELT WONDERFUL. Got myself dressed, and ready for the day. Was in such a good mood. Got home and did the laundry and cleaned up a few things. Read some emails and sat down and made out a menu for the week.
What are we having. I tried to pick FILLING FOODS.
Weight watchers had two plans. Core and Flex. Core was a list of less refined, wholesome foods that you could eat. There were a few rules like only eating potatoes, corn, brown rice, oatmeal, whole bran cereal, whole wheat spaghetti once a day. (so keep track of the carbs is my opinion)
You didn't have to write these items down, you just ate til you were satisfied. Well, I don't know when to stop. Actually I do, when I bend over and that "stuff" gets in your throat that is when I know I've eaten too much. So I would eat core foods and track the points. Stacia called it the FLOOR Plan. FLEX/CORE together. I lost 35 pounds doing that. Then I got lazy and just started eating what I wanted to.
Got me back up in weight too.
I started WW at 245 lbs. I got down to 160 lbs. (which life time at that time was 155). I stayed there for a week. Life was too stressful to stay there. Besides, I got pregnant with Karrea.
I had Karrea in November 2005, weighed in at 205. Felt GREAT!!!! Holidays came and went and so did my will power and I was stressed out!
I was too old to be a mommy to a new baby. I just couldn't grasp the concept of God giving me a baby to screw up again. Hadn't I screwed of 3 kids already??? I mean, really!!! I am the worst mom ever!
I cried almost every night!
I went back to weight watchers in January 2006, weighing in at 219. That is also when the Core plan was introduced. (if my memory serves me correctly, it was right around there anyway)
I jumped on the wagon. I lost 35 lbs by spring. IT FELT GREAT! The kids had lost 15 lbs too. We were fixing different fun foods. Like lots of stir fry. India (n) bread, Chicken Caeser Pizza, Brown rice haystacks, fat free muffins, etc.
Well, that is where we stand today. We are Back on the wagon.
My menu for this next week equals
Chicken Caeser Pizza
Easy Pasta E Faziole
Haystacks
Mexican Sloppy Joes
BBQ Chicken over baked potatoes
Angel hair wheat pasta Bolognese
BLT wraps (I get the low carb tortilla's, they take some getting used to, but I love them)
I'm going to try and attempt making my own pizza dough. The recipe calls for 4 1/2 cups of flour, but I'm going to sub 1 1/4 cup wheat flour. The points stay the same, but the fiber is upped.
I went shopping last night. I bought lots of fruit and frozen veggies, and good stuff! I'm excited. Wasn't excited about the bill, but the Lord will provide.
Now I need to go and find some wheat couscous. ha ha!!
I truly believe if I FILL up on these good foods my FEELINGS will be more in tact, and so will my family's.
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