Monday was a good day because the rest of the week was a challenge. After hearing about Stacie's passing (we were not close friends, we are just similar souls, sometimes you just feel that when you meet someone) I have been on a roller coaster of emotions.
I found out some news about Ron wednesday night and I have been in turmoil of how to handle it. I also was called to do something else in the church and I have been totally depressed. I am so much more willing to serve. I get tired of hearing "there are so many who have more than one calling we are all stretched to the limit" or We need to pray for people to move in so they can serve". I sit here playing tittliwinks. God, I'm not complaining. I am just wondering if someone is listening or not listening. I will have faith that God will speak louder to those who need to know, even if its me!
I visited my brothers Roger and Lyle yesterday after the funeral in Grand Island. I was there for 3 hours. I loved it, I needed it! It was nice to hear both of them speak so highly of me. Roger said to me......"Wow Sis, you really are a beautiful woman for 41" (I think those were his words). I told him about my calling and my feelings and he said....."You belong in the stake. You are spiritual, willing to serve, you love the Lord. When you walked in my house the spirit filled this room" Wow....thanks Rog!!! That is a lot coming from someone who is struggling with 'stuff' right now. Lyle gave me a pep talk about Adrienne. It was just a real blessing being there with family. I have been so detached from everyone its not even funny.
I was listening to Sheri Dews talk on CD FAMOUS LAST WORDS. What a blessing that was. Satan is raging, we all know that. The person he is attacking the most are the Women. You make a woman feel lonely and depressed and the whole family suffers. What Satan doesn't know is that if Woman who are feeling lonely and depressed cry unto the Lord they are healed, and guided to be better women! I have felt that this week. I don't want to be a woman that comes to the Lord in only trials, I do pray and read my scriptures every night. I have been trying to grow with the 21 days closer to Christ. I was slacking, but answers were given Thursday night when I started up again. Its like I wasn't really "slacking" it was just the Lord knew it wasn't time for me to recieve answers yet. The Lord is good to me!
He has his own timing. I have to keep telling myself that, it goes for the two things I'm wavering with right now. Timing, I just have to know where to be, and what to say and be a better example.
God is Good to me!